Yesterday was my best friend’s birthday party, and he introduced his girlfriend for the first time. She was very nice girl, I wasn’t that much of an ass, I managed to be relatively funny, I guess. It was a nice evening, we ate and drank a bit, played some Pitchcar Mini, and I actually came in second, that’s really good for me, because I really suck in the game. After we had finished our tournament, we went to a nice bar nearby, it’s called Luft. Stylish, but doesn’t have the snobbish feeling to it. I reached one goal of those I set for the evening. I got myself drunk! I guess spent more money that I could’ve really afforded, but I think it was actually worth it. I got home quite early for an evening out, but then managed to stay up for three more hours, yes, jacking off, even thought I wasn’t really horny at all. I guess I just felt like it anyway…
The rest of the night went on, I didn’t sleep well, and I woke up early to drive a moving van. The moving went okay, I recruited most of the yesterday’s party people to the job, and we were really fast. Afterwards we decided to fix some dinner for the whole gang, and then we played some Pitchcar again.
My brother had invited us at their place tonight, but we hadn’t really answered them yet. So, in the middle of the gaming, I got a message from them, asking if we were coming or not. I then called the boyfriend and asked if he had gotten my message that I sent him a bit earlier, asking him if we were going and telling him that it was so nice opportunity to spend more time with those friends that were all gathered at my best friend’s place. So, as I called him, he said he had got the message, but didn’t answer because I had promised to call. He called me when I was moving, and I said that we should talk later, because I was in the middle of moving process… And he then had made dinner, apparently for me too, and was very disappointed that I hadn’t called. Very understandable, but still, I don’t feel that I acted that bad again…
And the result is that now I’m alone home, don’t know if I want to go to my brother’s, don’t know if I want to go to the boyfriend’s place. Actually I do know, I don’t want to go anywhere, especially to his place, because I just feel so bad about everything. I hate this anxiety and bad feeling in my guts. I really, really think that it would be easier if I didn’t have to please him anymore. I felt really bad when I begun on this post, and cheered up a bit when writing about the fun in the past two days, and got back to the whole anxiety theme in the end. So this is where my holiday has gone, life really, really sucks.
